[Story] Hands Held in the Snow

Title: Hands Held in the Snow
Author: Thedude3445
Genre(s): Drama, Fantasy, Romance
Tags: Female Lead, Multiple Lead Characters, School Life, Slice of Life, Urban Fantasy, LGBT+
Audience:
Main Lead: Female
Status: Complete
VB Assessment Score: PDE 2 CDD 3 SWB 3 || TQ 3 SV 2 || Overall: 13
Number of Chapters: 70
Chapter Length: Medium
Reading Level: Medium
Date of First Release: December 17, 2019
Date of Last Update: August 6, 2020
VB Reviewed? No
Available on Platform(s): Royal Road
Number of Views: 40,321
Number of Reviews: 15
Synopsis:
Aspiring priest Beatrice dreams of saving the world. Delinquent debutante Emi dreads her looming engagement to a distant noblewoman. A chance meeting in a library ignites a flame of love in their hearts. But, as the pair explore the wintery city of Balarand and each other, they must contend with their relationship’s uncertain future. Only by walking together hand-in-hand can they face these obstacles for the sake of their futures.

Review(s)

Draphy_Dragon: The first thing I want to mention is that I absolutely adore the art. The style is so cute and in my opinion, captures the tone of the story well. As an artist, it makes me love this so much more!
The writing style immediately pulled me in. It was witty, had a strong voice and imaginative descriptions that truly made the story sing. I like the frame story of the grandmother narrating it.
The world building was another one of this book’s strong points. It’s very easy to picture the kind of place everything is happening in, and I like how little interactions with side characters are included in. It fleshes out the world so well. However, sometimes I did feel as though there was a little too much description, but that might just be me.
The main characters themselves were charming and cute. I love that Beatrice is training to be a priest, as that’s a profession/line of study I hadn’t encountered much in fantasy protagonists before.
All in all, I think this is an adorable slice of life story that’s certainly worth reading!

Velara: Hand’s Held in the Snow is a lesbian romance novel, set in a loving detailed fantasy world, with a delightfully tense political climate. The characters have unique, thoughtfully crafted personalities, and are generally a charm to watch. 
The story itself as of this point has a well written arc, which is beginning to show signs of tension that hint at struggles the blossoming romance may face. I was also delighted to see that the author decided to make the world generally accepting of LGBT characters and struggles introduced do not related to homophobia. 
Unfortunately, the otherwise pleasant narrative was dotted with puzzling sentence structures, typos and the occasional misused word, which hampered my enjoyment. However, these problems were relatively infrequent and could be overlooked due to the strength of the narrative and the characters.
Finally, what I felt was one of the stories greatest strengths was also, unfortunately one of its greatest weaknesses. That was the narrative style that the author used. The central conceit of the story is that someone’s grandmother is telling the story, and I adore some of the colour commentary it allows the author to add to their narration. However, at times the transition between first person and third person feel awkward and I sometimes am left puzzled as to how the grandmother were know the internal feelings of the characters in any given scene. 
Ultimately, Hand’s Held in the Snow is a charming tale which promises a potentially bittersweet lesbian romance. It has a well crafted story and character, and absolutely delightful illustrations.And while it is at times hampered by stylistic choices and grammatical errors, I can whole heartedly recommend it despite. 

Csuite: Dedicated romance is a genre which, through no fault of its own, typically struggles to engage me. So I was aware going into this story that I probably wasn’t part of the target audience, and should disclose I haven’t read many others in a similar vein against which to compare.
That said, I was pleasantly surprised by what I found. Right off the bat, Hands Held in the Snow establishes itself as being about more than just the developing relationship between its two leads. We’re introduced to a beautiful fantasy world rich in history and culture, which we see fleshed out in the details of each scene. The city where the story takes place has fallen under enemy occupation, and this tenuous political climate is treated with astute nuance and care. 
This is very much in keeping with what to expect from the story as a whole. It would have been easy to take this concept and build it from thin generalisations. Instead, every detail from the romance itself to the plot and setting is handled with admirable maturity. Characters act and react for understandable reasons, communicate well, and convey relatable complexity. 
And the characters are the stars of this story. Beatrice, a junior priest in training, navigates her studies, family life and religious rituals. Emi, the sheltered daughter of aristocrats, chafes against her restrictive lifestyle while acknowledging the benefits of its privilege. They make a captivating and competent couple. Half the charm comes from their story being told from alternating perspectives, allowing us to secure contrasting windows into each of their lives, hopes and tribulations. 
This thoughtful treatment extends to the diverse minor characters, who are also each charming and memorable in their own right. Nor is romantic love the be-all and end-all; relationships between family, friendships and mentors are treated with as much importance and affection.
Between that and the fantastic world-building, I think that’s what made this romance engage me when so many others fail. It doesn’t exist in a bubble – it impacts and is impacted by the world around it, and feels so much more meaningful as a result. It matters. Characters and world-building = perfect.
The other area the story excels in is its style. The tone is simple, descriptive, clear and easy to read. Dashes of humour pepper the prose every now and then, adding to the charm. The only criticism I have here is the way the story’s narrator, an as-yet-unidentified grandmother in some future time, can interject asides unexpectedly into the narrative. I actually love the concept of this and her often snarky quips, but the execution can be a touch jarring. As a reader, I had to pause and take a moment to figure out whose perspective it was coming from – it wasn’t always immediately clear – and this would pull me out of the flow of the story. But I think it could be a straightforward fix: more distinct separation for different perspectives in the formatting, for instance.
The grammar is likewise very good but feels like it needs one final proofread to fix up some lingering mistakes. Most are minor but I did spot a couple of occasions where they changed or confused the meaning of a sentence. Well above average, however, and they’re very much just typos rather than indicative of any inherent issues.
The story’s weakest aspect for me was its pacing. The beginning and closing thirds of the story move the plot along at a good pace, but it felt like the central segment slowed down a little without much progression, delving a tad more heavily into a slice of life focus. Thankfully, the rich character interactions carry the slack until the pace picks up again, so I found myself able to stay engaged throughout. And I should note (minus spoilers) I’ve been thoroughly enjoying the later chapters in particular. 
So as a reader who doesn’t tend to mix well with the romance genre, I can safely say I’m a convert to Hands Held in the Snow. Which is quite a feat. Read it for a mature, nuanced, uplifting and heartwarming take on life and love with an engrossing fantasy spin. Or read it for some wonderful world-building rich in seamlessly interwoven lore. And dare I encourage you to give it a try even if romance isn’t your thing – you may just be in for a surprise.

David Musk: I should start by saying that I don’t ordinarily read romance or slice of life stories, but I’ve been meaning to branch out so that I can become a better romance writer myself. Still, I realize I might not be the target audience so I’ll make an effort to be as objective as possible!
Style
Overall, the style is solid. Slightly humorous, with lots of personality. I was able to clearly visualize every scene and I was rarely ever confused. The amount of metaphors and evocative imagery here is far above average for a webnovel, which was a plus for me.
The descriptions are great, too. I think a lot of authors on this site take for granted that we know what certain things look like. For example, a city street. The problem is, there are a thousand different kinds of cities and time periods. Here’s a snippet from this book that really narrows down what sort of city we’re in:
“No house was identical to the next; each had the creative flair of the architect who designed it. The houses had gates, had yards of grass and cobblestone walkways. Their roofs were pointed high, the larger among them giving off the look of miniature castles, of barracks for an army of luxury. Several of Emi’s neighbors even had tiny ponds in their yards, with fountains in the center keeping the water fresh and flowing.”
This immediately feels European, but far more modern than medieval. Horses and carriages are also mentioned in another paragraph so we know that we don’t quite have cars yet.
Like I said, the descriptions are great. Even some of my favorite novels on here are too light in this department. Readers will still imagine something either way, but if we’re not on the same page as the author, that can lead to surprises later on. I know lots of poetic language and descriptions aren’t always popular in the webnovel world, but all it takes is a few sentences to make a world of difference.
The story starts out in a first-person omniscient style, like a storybook or a framed narrative (think: Princes Bride) where it’s clear we have one character (the grandmother) telling this story to her grandchildren.
My only issue here is that it’s not always consistent. There are some points in the story where the narrator injects her first-person comments or speaks directly to the reader. There are other times where we’re deep in one of the two POV character’s heads, experiencing the world exclusively through her eyes in a third-person limited perspective. Sometimes, a comment is made about the world. When that happens, I wonder who’s making the comment, the narrator from the beginning, or the POV character? I can usually figure it out, but that process isn’t as effortless as it could be. 
I’m not against this omniscient style but I think it could benefit from some more structure. For example, if it were confined to the prologue or interludes. It seemed like the author intended for the first chapter to be the most omniscient—which makes sense to me—however, it’s not 100% consistent.
Grammar
As usual, things are good here. No obvious problems aside from the occasional typo, which you’ll find in any story that isn’t professionally edited. There were also a few minor errors such as mixing up the words “laid” and “lay”, but nothing that distracted from the overall story. 
Character
As with style, character is where I found a lot of the book’s biggest strengths and weaknesses.
The two main characters feel quirky and realistic, with a lot of their personalities woven into the story’s narrative voice. I especially liked their individual reaction scenes after they meet the second time. These scenes felt especially authentic. 
I only have one complaint about the two main characters, and that’s that they seem too similar at times. Sure, they’re very different on paper. Beatrice comes from a modest family, she’s studious, tidy, and she’s training to become a priestess. Meanwhile, Emi comes from a rich family with more aloof parents. She has a messy room and she enjoys sneaking out of the house.
Middle-class vs. rich. Studious vs. rebellious. Neat vs. tidy. It seems like a case of opposites attract. But like I said, the differences here are on paper. They’re things that we’re told, but not necessarily shown in the way they act. 
While Emi is rich and upper-class, she’s extremely down to earth and somewhat street-smart (paying the neighbor kids to create a distraction while she sneaks back into her room.) While she can be slightly rebellious, she studies Economics in the library on her own, so she doesn’t seem like a genuinely bad student.  While Beatrice says she wants to spread joy to everyone, she’s also easily annoyed with her fellow students. In other words, their most extreme qualities are easily balanced, making them feel more alike.
The POV switches between the characters every other chapter and their narrative voices often feel very similar as well. From the moment they meet, they’re both infatuated with each other. When they meet the second time, they’re both eager to spend time together, but neither one wants to make the first move. 
They’re both quirky, nerdy, easily embarrassed, feminine, and seemingly introverted.
I bring this up because there was one point where I started reading from one character’s POV, and I couldn’t tell which one it was until I got some hint from the environment. (It had been a few days since I’d read the last chapter, and I’d forgotten their names.) So to the author, ask yourself this: if you were to write a chapter with one of the characters walking down the street (without using her name) how long would it take the readers to figure out which character it is?
As a writer, I know how hard it is to make each POV character unique. It’s hard enough when the characters are different genders or ages. Even harder in this case, when they’re both teenage girls. That’s why I think it’s all the more important to show the contrast between them. This contrast won’t just make the characters feel more unique, it will open the door for more conflict later on.
Aside from the two mains, most of the other characters seem more one-dimensional so far. Beatrice even refers to her father as a stereotypical scholar. Emi’s friend, Tia, also feels like a stereotype at this point. Now, we’re still in the setup stages of the story (Chapter 10, as of this review) so there’s still time for these characters to surprise us and break free form their molds. Setting up characters who seem stereotypical and then surprising readers later is a viable strategy, so I won’t be too harsh here.
Plot
There isn’t much to the plot so far besides the romance aspect. It’s clear that this is a slice of life rather than an epic fantasy, so I can’t fault the author for this. Aside from that, it’s always hard to give a decent plot review when a story is still in the setup stages.
I do see the hints of conflict here with Emi being engaged to a stranger and Beatrice becoming a priest (I’m assuming priests aren’t allowed to marry in this world?) We also get hints of a broader conflict with their city under occupation. Again, we’re still in the setup stages. I don’t know how long of a story the author is planning, but I would guess we’re still in the first 10% right now based on the pacing. Hopefully the continues to develop these conflicts later on!
World Building
One tricky thing about world building is making the readers curious—getting them to ask questions. That way, when it’s time for answers, you have their full attention. The author pulls this off exceptionally well, giving us just enough information about the world to make us curious. 
For example, this world seems to be fairly well developed technologically, yet they have no contact with the outside world (other continents, as they put it.) This immediately makes me curious what the reasons are. Is it magical in nature? Political? We hear hints about a long distance between continents, but that seems like a minor issue for a world with at least 1800’s level technology.This world also has same-sex arranged marriages, which is something I’ve never seen in any fantasy book, ever. Bonus points for trying something original. My first question about this was whether Emi’s parents took her preferences into consideration when they arranged the marriage, or whether this was a coincidence. (I found the answer by reading the comments, but I hope it’s also explained in the story.) This added a layer of nuance to Emi’s relationship with her parents. They took some of her preferences into consideration (she would prefer to marry a woman) but not necessarily others (she would prefer it not be a stranger)
Historically, many Western arranged marriages gave no regard to the children’s’ preferences. It’s essentially a “do your job” sort of thing. Western arranged marriages in our world also tend to be focused on producing an heir and furthering bloodlines. I would assume this world has different priorities from heirs/bloodlines, and I’m curious to see what they are.Overall
The story sets out to do exactly what it promises: it’s a slice of life fantasy romance set in a near-modern world. The writing quality is high, the main characters feel real and authentic, and we’ve seen the first hints of some interesting conflicts and world-building. As for the minor issues mentioned above, I think most of them could be resolved with time as the story develops further.

[omitted other reviews due to length and enough content shown above]

Story Post Last Updated: December 8, 2020

3 thoughts on “[Story] Hands Held in the Snow

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