[Story] Assassination System

Title: Assassination System
Author: TheAdventurer
Genre(s): Eastern Fantasy
Tags: System, Original
Audience: NC-17
Main Lead: Male
Status: Ongoing
Number of Chapters: 275
Date of First Release: August 5, 2018
Date of Last Update: February 8, 2019
VB Assessment Score: TQ 2   PD 2   CF 2   ||   RL 1   CL 3  ||  Overall: 10
VB Reviewed? No
Number of Views: 3 M
Number of Reviews: 179
Synopsis:
In a world fraught with innumerable dangers where living day by day is a struggle, a young man from the modern age transmigrated into such a world, accompanied by a peculiar system made for assassination.
[Move footsteps three inches apart for enhanced stealth.]
[Strike at the indicated acupoint to ensure a quick death!]
[Host has successfully assassinated the designated enemy! Gained one Assassination Point!]

Review(s)

drengoa: Overall it’s good, however its strayed far from where it began, I thought it’d be an awesome sneaky killing and shadows stalking sorts system, but unfortunately its devolved into just another stereotypical cultivation novel. It’s not bad but if you’d stuck to your original concept and made that flow and follow through it would be ALOT better.

Aruzu: The novel starts kinda rushed but seemed promising at leat for the first 15 chapters or so… was weird and not really from a good writer you can tell he’s a novice but still liked it despite it’s flaws.
Then thing got weird the author starts romance out of nowhere rushes a main battle invasion includes a demon/succubus out of nothing forces a relationship with a single mother whom at the start wasn’t described as young/beautiful but latter it’s amazing and after a magic from the secret god bloodline of the family which by the way comes out of nowhere she has potential to cultivate but not to be great because of age issues… then all of a sudden she’s a genius, great strategist almost beat the mc… well I don’t recommend this at all

Chenglei: The MC is reincarnated into a useless Young Master. (No surprise there.)
The idea of a System that gives Modern Weapons to the MC to use for assasination is very interesting.(Of course the bullets are coated with whatever energy is used in the Novel [I forgot what it was called.] )
The System also gives the MC missions in which if he completes he will recieve Assasination Points (AP [or was it SP? I forgot, haven’t read it in awhile.])
The MCs love life on the other hand seemed a bit, forceful/cliched. (This however is my opinion for others it may seem fluid.)
As for the plot there doesn’t seem to be any for the first 60+. (I haven’t read further so I am not sure if the story finally gets a plot. Most likely, yes.)
The Power Ranking in the Novel is a bit blurry in the first 50 Chapters. (Still not sure what a Divine Blessing is.)
Overall the Novel is actually quite interesting. Yes it does have a few blunders, however for his/her first Novel it is actually quite good.

Wadsdfe: The story started in a steady and well-rounded manner with a few typos here and there. But the story turned awkward really fast due to the rushed „character Building“ which feels more like the author trying to impose his fantasies on his MC which are justified with really far-fetched reasons. The author claims that he lacked a mother figure in his past life so treated a mother and daughter which he had seen for 2 Hours well due to this reason. This is due to the lack of details and Information plausible but that he turns her into his wife after a barely relatable arc just because he is claimed to be a Dating sim expert or whatever and that his feelings towards her change from feelings someone would have towards a mother figure to those of a wife within a text passage are unbearable for me. I dropped this novel because I like to read novels which are well thought through and that is written with the readers in mind and are not just used to write and include some fantasies which are detrimental for World Building. I do not care about the relationship itself but the rushed manner and logical gap between the chapters before and after are bothering me. And as I Write I notice that I really liked the story or more the beginning and plot but it is a pity.
It is obviously just my personal opinion and there are seemingly a lot of People that like this novel.

dukezinnia: The writing is ok, the MC isn’t a complete a**hole, there exists realistic people with realistic problems with realistic motives. All in all a miracle that Xanxia like this exists on this site. Better than anything else I found on there. BUT there is exists one thing that keeps this story from being good. Why in a world of high fantasy and superpowers do you need a cultivation cheat like the assassination system? All those superpower achievements feel so empty if you don’t teach the reader to care about the character that is achieving them first. You do a better job than almost anyone on this site does in that category but it is still so lacking. The best way to make people care about your MC do that is for you main character to have or make friends and/or companions. Not lovers, but true friends and companions. Starting in a place where your MC has a thouroughly trashed reputation always raises a red flag for me. It means that the kind of friends he can make are not the kind he wants to have.

IcedTT: Mediocre but not bad handwriting. Has stability for it’s updates. Author needs more work in the story development and background of the whole thing.. A little too rushed in the beginning and i had trouble thinking where this might lead to. During the coup, author could have made used of the points to get something better instead of spamming hand grenades. And an assassin who fails to kill a target is a fail product. Moving on, all i can see is MC getting horny every single time for a half a dozen plus chapters dedicated to it, i had to ask myself am i reading erotica or a system novel about assassination. Considering the fact that author is new at this, don’t get discouraged and i hope to see better works from you ib the future. But for now, i would have to say that i’m gonna drop this novel. You can improve in the future.

Kwydin: The titled “system” is still underused, I’m really glad, you’ve limited the purchases, though MC almost completely stopped using the system altogether.
It still lacks a clear direction and it’s place in the novel. Yes during battles simulation aspects are still used, but it feels like that’s the end of it. There were mentions of crafting, alchemy (I think I don’t remember clearly at this point). MC occasionally gets a mission.
Novel just feels almost like a typical cultivation novel at this point.
As for character development, I would say that at the very least MC has a very slow development curve, too slow I might say. Especially when compare it to his wives.
Currently the most exciting progression has Natalie, she’s the most charismatic character in the novel, at times I would loved to see her as MC instead.
Grace while not that new of a character, she was just introduced to cultivation part of this world in the last volume, so it’s acceptable, though you gave her quite a start, poor Dan, weaker than both waifus.
And lets move to the peeve of the cast, Juliet, there’s nothing special about her, while she is (or was) supposed to be fairly important character. Lacks some kind of a support, family wise, shes offset as kind of a third wheel, with the exception of a bit of fluff in the story, she just doesn’t fit in the story.

Satoyo: There are a lot of really obvious writing mistakes. Incorrect usage of he/she him/her litter the story making it hard to follow along who the writer is referring to.
Pacing isn’t great. Feels like author is trying to force a different style of mc character growth that a lot of times just doesn’t make sense with the tools that surround the main character and how smart everyone around him seem to be it feels like a lot of just stupid thoughts concerning how to train the mc.
Characters development seems good at first glance but then some pretty weird writing makes you wonder why the characters just seem so dumb at times for no reason especially around mc growth.
How writer handles mc growth is biggest issue for me because he has so many tools (system and strong characters surrounding him) but isn’t smart enough to use the system to actually learn how to get stronger on his own or actually get training until he is forced by 1 character.
Overall story feels good but with some glaring issues in what I feel like is just forced writing and really bad editing (grammar) I can’t enjoy it as much as I would like to.

Ube: Writing Quality: 3 ***
– This is due to the author not giving a proper development for every thing that happens within the story. Things just happen out of nowhere in things such as the MC’s love interest. The good thing is there are not too many mistakes in the author’s spelling or grammar. The issue only lies within the author’s delivery.
Stability of Updates: 5 *****
-At the time of writing, I have not yet arrived at the latest chapter. But a short scroll through the table of contents allows me to conclude that the author is very diligent in releasing chapters daily. The author has achieved a minimum of 1 chapter per day and a maximum of 5 chapters per day on this web novel. Although this is great, I would suggest that the author should only try maintain it at 1 or 2 chapter per day so that more time can be put into improving the quality and to avoid health issues.
Story Development: 3 ***
– It is an interesting novel, the only issue is that the development is not consistent and is too rushed. Most of the problems surrounding the development of the story can be attributed to the character design, mainly the MC and those close to him.
Character Design: 2 ** CONTAINS SPOILER FOR 3 DIFFERENT CHAPTERS
– This is the area that bugs me the most with this novel. Characters do not match their ‘mold’. For example, the father is an esteemed general and yet he allows his son, who he knows to be a person who does not focus on cultivation and only knows how to harasses women, to lead an army. Sure, the father saw his son fight others in one of the chapters, but someone of his ranking should have the brains to doubt his son and not be confident in him blindly unless he doesn’t care about the lives of his men. Better yet, why would an esteemed general let his son, who he does not know the full capabilities of, to go ahead and assassinate the opposing army’s leader? From what he understands of his son, he should be doubting the mental health of his son for proposing such a plan or be worried for the success of the mission or safety of his son. Anyway, what I would like to say is that each of the characters should have a proper foundation that can justify their decisions and actions. Whatever they do, should make sense from what was said in previous chapters or descriptions. The chapter that annoyed me the most was when the MC got together with his love interest. Whatever the MC told the love interest did not match with what happened in previous chapters. I started to doubt whether the MC was just coaxing her or it was just simply bad development.
The author has a nice naming sense though. Just need to put more effort in building stable foundations for the characters and make them stay in character unless they are forced by the circumstances.
World Background: 3 ***
-Barely any information is given about the world but there is no issue with that. Your typical cultivation world, just with a different naming for the cultivation levels.
All in all, this is a decent novel to read to pass time when you’re bored. I do not suggest this to people who are picky about quality of the story itself. The author is improving and I think that his/her next story would be an interesting read if he/she comes up with a good plot. Read this novel if you wish to witness the authors’ rise.
To the author: Good job and keep it up. If you find my review bad or mean in anyway, I am not sorry. 🙂 If writing is your passion, I hope it helps. Though I think there are more I want to say(both positive and negative), it’s already late and I can’t remember them.

 
Story Post Last Updated: March 20, 2019

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